Loving "difficult" people

Luke 10: 25 - 37

Today’s gospel covers a moral principle that is so fundamental, something we have all heard so many times. In theory we all agree that you should love your neighbor as you love yourself.   You would be hard pressed to find someone who didn't agree with the Golden Rule, to treat other people as you would like to be treated, it’s something we all learn in Kindergarten.  In today’s Gospel we heard the parable of the Good Samaritan, which is such a beautiful and meaningful passage. Because we have heard it so often, we can listen without giving it a second thought.  We have no problem agreeing with the message.  Of course we should love our neighbor as ourselves. Of course our neighbor is everyone, there are no exceptions.  We get it, we need to love everyone and treat everyone as we would like them to treat us. When we hear the story we might even judge the priest and Levite harshly.  How could they possibly pass the man by who is in such great need?  I guess they both need to go back to kindergarten.  In theory we all agree that we should love our neighbor as ourselves and treat others as we would like to be treated.

In practice, however, it is not easy to love our neighbor.  In our daily lives we often encounter people who we simply cannot treat as we would like them to treat us.  Take a moment to picture in your mind some person, or perhaps people that you just have a hard time getting along with. Think of someone who upsets you, someone you find it difficult to be around, someone who you would never go out of your way to help.  Perhaps you were thinking of your boss at work who is rude and overly demanding.  Maybe you pictured someone who lives close by that you find annoying, someone who when you see them coming down the street you want to go inside your house and hide because you do not want to get into a conversation with them.  Or did you think of a member of your extended family who always gets on your nerves because they never pull their weight, they are just a little lazy? I suspect that we all were able to think of someone.  Two things are important to realize: 1) Like the man who fell victim to robbers, that person is in need of something. Perhaps it is something as simple as a kind greeting or someone to listen to them. 2) According to Jesus, that person is your neighbor, someone you should love as yourself.  The truth is that we all behave like the priest and Levite in the gospel, we often pass people by who are in need of our help, love and support.

           

We tend to make excuses that allow us to pass by our neighbor who is in need. Often we come up with reasons that justify our indifference toward people we come in contact with who are in help. The priest and the Levite in the parable of the Good Samaritan did the same. The priest needed to remain ritually pure in order to do his job. If the man were a non-Jew or already dead, touching him would mean that he would become impure. Surely this should excuse him from helping the man. Levites were often assistants to the priests. Some commentators suggest that the Levite saw the priest pass by the man in need so   the Levite was able to excuse himself from helping the man, thinking “if even the priest is not helping him, I need not”. Like the priest and Levite we too make excuses for passing by those in need of love and help. We excuse ourselves from greeting a rude co-worker by telling ourselves that they are always unkind and abrasive to us. Why should we be nice to them? We make it too easy to pass by a beggar on the street by telling ourselves that they are probably faking or that they will just spend the money on booze. Further from home, we excuse ourselves from thinking too much about those in the developing world because they are so far away, nothing we could do could ever make a difference. We tend to come up with excuses that justify our indifference towards people who are in need of our attention.

The first step in loving our neighbor as ourselves is repenting of our hardness of heart, the indifference, we have towards some people. In order to really treat other as we would like them to treat us we must start by repenting for all the times that we have made excuses that have allowed us to think that some people were not really our neighbor and ignore their needs. Recently Pope Francis visited Lampedusa, a small Italian island far south of Sicily, close to the African continent.  Lampedusa is famous because tens of thousands of refugees fleeing Africa land there as they try to enter Europe.  Thousands of Africans have lost their lives making the journey to Italy from Africa.  Pope Francis spoke about how we have become blind to the plight of these refugees.  Our behavior towards them has been like that of the priest and the Levite in the parable. Pope Francis begged God for the grace to no longer be indifferent, to see again these refugees as our neighbors.  Interestingly the Pope did not come proposing some political solution to the problem.  He is telling us that the first step in loving others as we love ourselves is to stop being indifferent to those who suffer. The Pope wanted to show those refugees who suffer, our neighbors, that we see their sufferings and that we want to stand by them.  He went to make a “gesture of closeness”.  What the Pope has done is an example for us all.  Repenting of our indifference is the first step in loving others as we love ourselves.

During our life we won’t be able to help every person in need who we come in contact with. We cannot solve everyone’s problems, but we need to ensure that our hearts do not become closed to those who suffer.  We need to be careful that we are not making excuses that allow us to be indifferent towards some people, that we can pass them by without noticing their suffering.  This is the first step in following the commandment to love others as you love yourself.  Let’s return to that question I asked earlier, “think of someone who upsets you, someone you find it difficult to be around, someone who you would never go out of your way to help”.  Maybe it was your boss or relative. Today let us ask God for the grace to see that person as your neighbor who is in need of your attention. Let us try to stop making excuses that allow us to pass by this person. Ask God to remove your indifference.

Judge much?

Matthew 9:32-38

When we see someone doing a good deed for someone else, you would think that our natural reaction would be happiness.  You would think that we would give thanks when we see someone going out of their way to help someone out. Unfortunately, often we do not react in this way. For various reasons - jealousy, insecurity or prejudice - we have a tendency to tear down people who do good for others.

Often we negatively judge those who go out of their way to help others.  When we see somebody doing good, sometimes we will try to tear them down by suggesting that their motivations for doing good are selfish or misguided.  In the gospel of today this is happening to Jesus.  Jesus has done a good deed in curing a man of his muteness by casting out a devil.  Most people react positively.  The Pharisees respond by trying to tear down Jesus. They say bad things about Jesus and His intentions, that He “by the ruler of the demons he casts out demons”.  We can act in the same way as the Pharisees sometimes.  In school, for example, when one student does some good deed, the other students will call him/her a “teacher’s pet” or “suck-up”.  If someone volunteers a lot of time in the Church we may say, either to ourselves or to others, that that person is just looking for attention.  When we hear about a celebrity giving a large sum of money to charity we call it a “publicity stunt” or claim they are doing it just to get a tax write-off. When we see other people doing good, we unfortunately have a tendency to try to tear them down by making a negative judgement of their intentions or motivation for doing the act.

The remedy for this kind of judging is to get out and do good deeds ourselves.  When we find ourselves falling into the trap of judging negatively those who do charitable acts, we should go and do something kind ourselves.  If we are busy doing good works, then we will be too busy for name-calling. We need to remember that God alone can judge people’s hearts and intentions. If we ourselves are the victims of negative judgement, the solution is to continue doing good works. In the gospel Jesus does not respond to the name-calling of the Pharisees. On the other hand He goes out of His way to do more for the needy. Jesus’ is more concerned to help those who suffer than the derogatory statement of the Pharisees.  Jesus recognizes the neediness of the people, that they are like “sheep without a shepherd”.  He is concerned with serving, not defending Himself from derogatory comments.  At the end of the gospel Jesus expresses His desire that we too become laborers in this work.  Whether we find ourselves the victim of negative judgement or we are the one doing the judging, the remedy is to get out and perform charitable, kind acts for the needy.

Today let us examine ourselves. If we find that we judge negatively those who do good works, let us repent. If we ourselves are the victim of such abuse, let us take heart that Jesus Himself suffered in the same way. Whatever the case, let us all ask for the grace to be good laborers at service of those in need, who do the right thing regardless of what others think or say about us.

Peace starts at home

Isaiah 66: 10-14 ; Galatians 6: 14-18 ; Luke 10: 1-12, 17-20

When I was a child my favorite part about Mass on Sunday was the sign of peace, because it meant that I got to go around and shake people’s hands.  Each Sunday we have the opportunity to offer each other the sign of peace, to say “peace be with you”.  In today’s gospel Jesus speaks much about peace.  Today Jesus sends His disciples on a mission.  The disciples are told that when they encounter others they are to offer them peace in a gesture so much like the sign of peace we offer at Mass.  As Christians, Jesus sends us to bring peace to others. Sometimes we offer people peace so casually at Mass, but we do not think about what true peace means.  What is this peace that we want to “be” with other people?  Also, it is very important to consider if, outside of this gesture on Sundays, we are offering peace to those we come in contact with on a daily basis.

True peace, the kind of peace Christ talks about in the Gospel, has a deeper meaning than we normally imagine.  The peace that we are to offer at Mass is something that is so much more than the way that peace is usually understood.  We usually think that peace is simply the absence of conflict.  We say that after World War II there was peace in Europe after the treaties.  There was peace because open conflict had ceased. But was there true peace?  Far from it.  After fighting had stopped, people in Europe were deeply wounded by the violence done.  There was anger and despair in people’s hearts.  A treaty did not obtain full, true peace.  The peace that Jesus is talking about is so much more.  True peace is peace of heart; it is consolation, joy and tranquility.  This peace is not something man-made but comes as a gift from God.  The first reading speaks vividly of the peace God brings.  He consoles us like a mother nursing her baby.  God comforts us like a parent comforts their child by putting them upon their lap.  St. Paul reminds us in the 2^nd reading that the peace that God gives us was won by the Jesus’ passion and death on the cross.  On the Cross Jesus conquered the enemies of peace: sin and death.  True peace is a gift from God and was won by Jesus on the cross.   

When we receive this kind of peace from Jesus, we need to share it with others.  If our heart is truly touched by this kind of peace we are compelled to go give it to those around us.  Picture for a moment an empty glass. Imagine that you take a pitcher full of water and begin filling the glass.  When the glass is full, you continue to pour the water so that the glass overflows and water runs down the cup and onto its surrounding.  This is what happens when Jesus fills us with peace.  In this analogy, the water is peace, our heart is the glass and Jesus is the one holding the pitcher.  When Jesus pours peace into our heart, He fills us to the brim and the peace we receive will spread to those around us.  The heart of every person thirsts for peace.  In order to spread peace to those around us we must first receive God’s peace, we must allow Jesus to fill our cup. You cannot give what you do not have.  Notice in the gospel that the disciples are only sent to bring peace to others after having been with Jesus.  They first received peace from Him.  We receive Jesus’ peace through prayer and receiving the Sacraments, especially the sacrament of reconciliation.  When we do this we become like that overflowing cup, God`s peace will flow from us to those we come in contact with.  When our heart is touched by God`s peace we transmit peace to others.

Though many will accept the peace we offer, some will reject it.  When we go bringing peace to those around us, though the majority will willingly accept it, some will not want to receive it.  In the gospel, after Jesus has sent His disciples on a mission he warns them of this reality.  Some people will welcome them, others will not.  If you are looking for an example of people rejecting Christians and their message, look no further than the Internet.  Many of you are probably aware that the past two Popes have had Twitter accounts.  If you have no idea what Twitter is, if you think that a “tweet” is just a sound a bird make, allow me to clarify.  Twitter is a program that allows you to send a short message to a large group of people.  People can share this message with others and even respond to your message.  Pope Benedict and Pope Francis have used Twitter to share short Gospel messages with millions of people.  In general their messages have been well received.  But, it you ever look at the responses people write, you would be shocked.  Many people write incredibly rude and hateful responses to the Popes.  There are a lot of broken and wounded people who respond to a well-intentioned message with outright hostility.  When we are rejected in this way, we should not get angry or stay to debate. We shouldn't “feed the trolls”, as they say in internet lingo.  We should follow the advice of Christ and “shake the dust from our feet”.  We must not allow the hate and bitterness of others to cling to us and poison us, destroying our peace.  We should shake it off.  Though many will accept the peace we offer them, some people, who are wounded and broken, will reject it.

           

Jesus calls us to bring peace to all people, but we need to start with those closest to us, our own family.  Christ’s mission to bring peace far and wide must start in our own family.  Mother Teresa often said that “peace starts at home”.  If a family is at peace, then it will bring tranquility to society.  On the other hand, if a family is at war, it will bring discord to society.  It is like when you throw a pebble in a pond and ripples are formed on the surface of the water that spread far and wide.  Such a small stone can have such a great effect.  Likewise, a family that is at peace creates a ripple-effect in society; its affect can be huge.  How then can we bring peace to our family? To quote Mother Teresa again: “works of love are works of peace”.  Through small works of love we can bring peace to our families and eventually to the world.  Something as simple as a smile or saying “good morning” can bring peace.  Helping a younger brother or sister with their homework or house chores is a work of love.  Taking the time to listen patiently to your husband or wife who has had a hard day at work is an act of peace.  Calling up an elderly relative to see how they are doing is also a work of love.  Works of love are works of peace.  Peace starts at home; from there it radiates to all of society.

Today our world yearns for the peace that only Jesus Christ can give.  Jesus sends us to bring this peace to others.  Whenever we give each other the sign of peace we can remind ourselves of this in a special way.  It is significant that shaking hands is a sign for agreeing to something, of making a deal.  When you give the sign of peace today, let it be your chance to agree to be someone who brings peace to others, starting with the members of our own family.  Let us agree to bring peace by doing simple acts of love.  Every time we offer each other the sign of peace commit to doing this.  Let us shake on it.