Why and how to give fraternal correction

Matthew 18:15-20 (23rd Sunday of Ordinary Time, year A)

Imagine someone is walking in a forest and because of all the trees they cannot see more than a few feet ahead. Now imagine that you are standing on a hill above the trees. From your location you can see the person and where they are walking. What would you do if you the person was walking towards a cliff? Without question, we would call out and warn them of the physical danger. Now, what would you do if you noticed that someone was in moral danger because their sinful actions were hurting themselves and others? Would you warn them through something we call fraternal correction?

The first reading strongly urges us to do just that. We are called to be watchers who warn and correct people when their behavior takes them on the wrong path. Giving fraternal correction is a very difficult, delicate and even terrifying task. If it was something we enjoyed doing, we would probably need to examine our motivations. Being watchers does not mean we become busybodies, looking for every opportunity to scold and correct. The second reading points to the only proper motivation for fraternal correction: love. Because of our love for others we want them to live the best lives possible. In the Gospel, Jesus tackles the question of fraternal correction when giving some very practical advice for dealing with a common situation. What do we do when someone sins against us? If someone says or does something to us which hurts us, how are we to respond? Or, what do we do if someone is involved in some sinful behavior? Jesus gives a four-step plan for how we should respond with love.

Step one: When someone hurts you, go and tell other people about it by gossiping. Just kidding! Significantly, Jesus does not tell us to do this.  When someone sins against us or when we see they are on the wrong path, our natural tendency is to gossip about it. “Can you believe what so-and-so said to me?” “Did you hear that so-and-so is having an affair?” The first thing we are to do is to go in private and speak with that person, explaining in a humble way why we feel their behavior was wrong. In such a conversation our hearts must be open, ready to forgive. Approaching the person directly, unlike gossiping and backbiting, gives the individual the opportunity to change. It is the loving thing to do.

Step two: If the person doesn't listen to you, now go and tell everyone what they have done. Kidding again! Jesus tells us to get one or two others and go correct the person. This is helpful for two reasons. First, it gives us the opportunity to examine our intentions. Has the person who hurt us really done wrong? Perhaps it is just a misunderstanding or a personal vendetta. Secondly, when several people, all motivated by love of the individual, approach them, it can be a very compelling motivation to change.

Step three: If that person still doesn't listen, now is the time to gossip. Now we take to twitter or the local newspaper to rant about the person, right? Nope! Jesus always wants us to act in such a way that the individual is given a chance to change. He tells us at this point to “tell the church”. In a time in which the Church has been plagued by scandal because of the covering-up of sins of its members, I need to be clear that Jesus is not advocating we keep things hidden from the public view. There are serious sins and crimes that must be reported to the appropriate civil authorities. When Jesus instructs us to “tell the church”, He means telling responsible, trusted individuals in authority who could try to convince the person to get on the right path.

Step four: If the person does not listen to the church, treat them as a gentile or tax-collector. This is strong language and Jesus is not kidding. For the Jewish people, gentiles and tax collectors were not part of their community. In serious cases the Church has the power and responsibility to excommunicate someone, cutting them off from the community. This action is not supposed to be a permanent type of shunning. Remember that when it came to sinners and tax collectors, Jesus always acted like the Good Shepherd, actively seeking them out and trying to bring them back into communion. Excommunication is tough love. It is meant to shake the person up and move them to convert.  As well, it show others that continuing obstinately in certain behaviors is not ok. You may have heard in the news about a recent, high profile example. In June, Pope Francis visited southern Italy, the stronghold of organized crime run by the mafia. In this traditionally Catholic area, members of the mafia try to pass themselves off as faithful Catholics in order to retain popular support. On this visit, Pope Francis declared that members of mafia “are not with God, they are excommunicated”. He called on the mafia bosses to repent, warning that “hell … awaits you if you continue down this road”. With this powerful gesture, Pope Francis is showing true love to the members of the mafia by fulfilling his duty of being a watcher.

How do you respond when someone sins against you? What do you do when someone hurts you by what they say or do? For many of us, myself included, it is all too easy to respond with gossiping and backbiting. Today we should remember that the greatest commandment is to love. A way not to show love is not to warn our neighbors when their behavior hurts them or others. Let us be good watchers.

Jesus' unexpected solution to the problem of pain and suffering

Matthew 16:21-27  (22nd Sunday of Ordinary Time, year A)

The Weeping Woman, Picasso, source

Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon. (Woody Allen)

Most people get a fair amount of fun out of their lives, but on balance life is suffering, and only the very young or the very foolish imagine otherwise. (George Orwell)

God had one son on earth without sin, but never one without suffering. (St. Augustine)

Suffering is universal. It’s the one thing Buddhists, Christians, and muslims are all worried about. (John Green, author of the Fault in our Stars)

Because suffering is a universal experience, religions and philosophies have all tried try to explain how best to deal with its presence in our lives. Here’s some examples:

• Stoicism explains that you should try your best to be indifferent to both pleasure and pain. When you are faced with suffering you need to “keep a stiff upper lip” and “suck it up”.
• Hedonism argued that pleasure is intrinsically good and pain is inherently evil. You should do whatever you can to maximize pleasure in your life and flee from whatever causes you suffering.
• Buddhism teaches that suffering is caused by unfulfilled desire. To get rid of suffering, you need to eliminate all desire in your life.
• Islam proposes that when faced with suffering you must endure it, not question why you suffer but rather endure it as God’s will and submit to it as a test of faith.
• The Old Testament presents various views to the topic of suffering. In places, suffering is viewed as a punishment for sin. In the story of the just man Job, however, we see that suffering is rather a test of faith. Ultimately, the Old Testament does not reach a final resolution regarding how best to approach suffering.

Jesus did not come to eliminate suffering. Rather, He showed how we could transform suffering in our lives, filling it with purpose and meaning. In today’s gospel, Jesus explains that both He and His followers will have to suffer. Peter is having none of this news and rebukes Jesus for even suggesting it. In response, Jesus rebukes Peter, calling him a Satan, that is, someone who is opposed to the plans of God. Though Jesus does not remove suffering from His or our lives, neither does He flee from it or simply grin and bear it. Jesus freely chooses to go to Jerusalem, the place of His Passion. Jesus’ solution to the problem of suffering is to confront it head-on by offering Himself out of love. When Jesus makes His whole life a gift to others, He transforms the suffering that is in His life and makes it salvific. His suffering becomes a source of life for the whole world. He rises from the dead and reunited us with God the Father. We are called to respond to suffering in the same way. When we choose to offer our whole life to God and others out of love, the suffering in our life is redeemed so that it brings goodness to ourselves and others.

When we live Jesus’ paradoxical program for dealing with suffering, we discover that it leads to true fulfillment and happiness. St. John Paul II explained that human happiness is guided by the Law of the Gift. Just as it is a law that we need oxygen to live, the Law of the Gift dictates that true happiness is found by making our lives a gift to others by putting ourselves at the service of others rather than focusing on ourselves. We are tempted to think that if we possess all the best things and have others at our beck and call then we will be happy. When we focus on ourselves, however, we ultimately become sad because our sufferings, problems and what we lack in our life seem so large and inescapable. On the other hand, when we make ourselves a gift to others by serving God and our neighbour, we get the perspective to see that our problems are not so bad. We discover the joy of living in relationships with others and the peace that comes through service. I remember clearly one of the first times I discovered firsthand the truth of the Law of the Gift. During my first year at University I volunteered to help out at a parish dinner washing dishes. On my way to the dinner my mind was full of worries and concerns regarding all the homework I had to do. I was stressed out and feeling down. The short experience helping out at the dinner changed my mood completely. By the end, I felt peace and happiness. It gave me joy to be able to help others. My problems didn't feel so big after all. At some time we have all experienced this truth articulated by Jesus: “For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.”

We cannot choose whether we suffer in life or not; we can only choose how we confront suffering. Here we do well to remember the words of Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI:

It is not by sidestepping or fleeing from suffering that we are healed, but rather by our capacity for accepting it, maturing through it and finding meaning through union with Christ, who suffered with infinite love. (Saved in Hope: Spe Salvi)

When we live the Law of the Gift in our lives, our suffering is kept in check and is even transformed into something that brings life and goodness to others. Is it an easy way to live? By no means. It is, however, the only truly effective solution to the problem of suffering. Today take a moment to remind yourself of a time when you experienced the Law of the Gift in your life. Recall the joy and happiness you felt. Allow that experience to motivate you to continue living that way in the future.

Who do you say Jesus is? Have you been "called out"?

Matthew 16:13-20 (21st Sunday in Ordinary Time, year a)

What kind of car do you drive? What do you do for a living? What do you study? Android or iPhone?  We often ask people these questions because the answers they give (particularly about their choice of smart-phone...) tells us a lot about what kind of person they are. Though such questions are helpful, from this Sunday’s Gospel we can gleam three more important and fundamental questions. The answers we give to these three questions strike to the core of our identity and how we have chosen to live our life.

1) Who do you say Jesus is?

Jesus poses the question of His identity in the Gospel. First, the apostles explain that the people think Jesus is John the Baptist, Elijah or one of the prophets. Next, Jesus challenges the apostles to tell Him who they personally believe He is. Peter alone responds with the grace-filled profession of faith that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of the Living God.  In other words, Jesus is God incarnate, come to save the world. Today, who do the people say that Jesus is? Most would say He was a good man, a wise leader and a sage teacher, but stop there. Though safe, these responses do not answer the question Jesus wanted to know about His identity. Jesus was an incredibly provocative individual; He wasn't really concerned if people thought He was good, wise or caring. Jesus claimed to be God and our Savior. Like Peter, each of us needs to decide if we believe Him or not. In his famous “trilemma”, C.S. Lewis, a Christian author best known for the Narnia series, explained the choices we faced when responding to this question. As Jesus claimed to be God, we are left with three options. If Jesus knew that He was not God and yet claimed to be, that would make Him a liar and a vicious and manipulative man. If Jesus honestly thought He was God but really wasn't, that would make Him a lunatic and a very dangerous man. When we look at the Gospels, it is clear that Jesus’ behavior proves He is neither a liar nor a lunatic. C.S. Lewis argues that we are left with one final option: Jesus is exactly who He claims to be and is thus our Lord. When we believe that Jesus is Lord, we must respond by worshiping Him and putting Him at the center of our life. Liar, lunatic or Lord? Who do you say Jesus is?

2) Have you been “called out”?

After Peter’s profession of faith, Jesus talks about His Church. Believing that Jesus is Lord is not the end. When we believe this we become part of a community founded by Jesus, the Church. In the original Greek, the word for Church is ekklesia, which literally means “called out from”. The question is, called out from what? The scriptures make it clear that we have been called out from the world. Now, we know that in the world there certainly is much good. When the Bible talks about the world, however, it is referring to all the evil that exists which is in opposition to God’s plans: greed, error, violence, jealousy and jealousy. The Church, therefore, is a people who have been called out from the world, gathered and given the job of continuing the mission of Jesus to fruition. Simply asking the question, “are you Catholic?” is not enough. We can say we are a Catholic - perhaps we even go to Mass each Sunday - but this fact makes little difference in the rest of our lives. We are no different from the world. To help us consider whether we have truly been called out, it is helpful to consider this question, often asked in sermons: If being a Christian were a crime, would there be enough evidence to convict you? Seriously, think about it. Imagine for a moment that it was illegal to be a follower of Jesus. One day you are dragged in front of a judge. For weeks prior to this, all your actions and words were under secret surveillance. At your trial, all the evidence is brought forward. How would the trial go? Would you be acquitted and found not guilty of being a Christian? Would you be convicted and found guilty? Would there be reasonable doubt in the matter? Have you been “called out”?

3) Are you a person of hope?

As members of the Church, the world won’t let us leave it without a fight. Outside the world we witness violence, persecution and an often discouraging response to the Church and her message. Within the Church too we see sin, scandal and division. Much of what happens both within and outside the Church, can tempt us to fall into a state of hopelessness. In the Gospel, Jesus gives us an assurance that should be a constant source of hope: “the gates of the netherworld shall not prevail against it”. Jesus is victorious. Since the Church is His Body we can be sure that it will weather all storms, whether they come from within or without. This hope is expressed in an interaction between Napoleon and Cardinal Consalvi, that is as funny as it is serious. At this time, in the early 1800’s, Napoleon and his army were sweeping across Europe, conquering country after country in an effort to dominate the globe. At the height of his power, Napoleon issued this threat to Church officials: I will destroy your Church. Hearing the threat, Cardinal Consalvi responded with what must be one of the best comebacks in history: He will never succeed. We have not managed to do it ourselves. In the Gospel, Jesus mentions a very important source of hope within the Church. The Church will be built upon Peter. As Catholics we see this as referring to the Office of Peter, also known as the papacy. The Office of Peter is a special gift of Jesus to the Church which helps us maintain unity as a community following Jesus and continuing His mission. For me personally, Pope Francis, like the popes before him, is a sign of hope. With his words and actions Pope Francis strongly reminds us that as members of the Church we are to be people of unshakable hope founded on the words of Jesus.

Socrates famously said that “the unexamined life is not worth living”. To live well, we need to take the time to get to know who we really are and what we are living for. Just as asking others questions is a great way of getting to know them, asking ourselves questions is a wonderful way to get to know ourselves. Today take some time to examine your life by answering the three questions posed by today’s Gospel: 1) who do you say Jesus is?, 2) Have you been “called out”? and 3) Are you a person of hope? Let us make our lives more and more worth living.